Dirty but fun!!

Hayden: You are breaking up with me because I “smoke too much pot
and like video games”?!! Are you fucking serious? Good luck finding a
guy who will sit around doing nothing but sit around waiting for you
because you were dumb enough to take 20 credit hours and are always
 too busy studying to do ANYThing fun. PS-I am GLAD you broke up
with me, the sex was shit.


Biance: It wasn’t exactly stellar for me either. I couldn’t feel a thing.

Hayden: Maybe cause your vag is so loose, whore.

Biance: Actually, Hayden, as you well know, you were my first
and only sexual partner. I was rather surprise when my first time didn’t
hurt… at all. But now it all make sense. I just went to the doctor and
found out my hymen is still intact.

Hayden: Fuck you, bitc. That’s impossible, we had sex SEVENTEEN times.

Bianca: … Exactly

In the land of Arabs!

Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but Dad,I am bit ashamed to arrive to my college with my Gold Mercedes, when all my Teachers travel by train.

Your Son

Nasser

Sometime later Nasser gets reply to his e-mail from his Dad:

Loving son,

Twenty Million Dollars transferred to your account, please stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too.

Your Dad

Be original! Enjoy Life!

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The local paper read:
PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.
The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The bishop was buried the next day.

Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery . . .
So be yourself and enjoy life.
Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!!